School, People, Stress ?

School's stressful, the classes, the work, the people. I can't keep up with half of it. This vacation I dropped a few friends that I didn't need in my life, the friends that only caused bullshit and didn't help me in any way shape or form, and I'm happy without them. As for classes, I try to focus on my work but I always have the tendency of thinking about other stuff, other pointless stuff that's not going to help me in the long run. I just hate everything about school, sounds pretty cliche, but there's no other way to begin to explain the feelings I have towards it. Besides that, everything has been right on track. I haven't been as angry as I used to be, I guess this vacation did that to me. Excluding this week, because I'm PMSing big time. Maybe that's why school is getting to me so bad at this moment, but yesterday, I couldn't bare the thought of even being around certain people, let alone actually being with them. Cramps got the best of me today, and I stayed home from school, and I feel stress free. Anyways, Kayla's sweet 16 is coming up in a few weeks and I'm so excited, and even more excited to go dress shopping. It's ironic how people you know SO well, become people you've known SO well, and the people you thought you'd never speak to a day in your life become the people you find yourself closest to. I'm really not complaining, because things work out for the better, and that's why I don't strive to get the people from my past back into my life. I don't even want them in my present to be honest, because half the people who left my side, or who I've pushed aside, weren't even worth it, and I can say that with all honesty. I hate how I rant on about so much worthless shit, but it makes me feel so much better that I'm actually letting my thoughts out rather than keeping them inside, and soon forgetting I ever felt this way. I used to own two journals, one with my perspectives in life, because I knew looking back at in a few years, I'd feel so much different and look at life so much differently, and one with everything that was going on in my life. I stopped writing in it over some time, and I guess I regret it. I'll pick that up sooner or later when I'm not so lazy. As for the job I was talking about a few blogs down, @ the arbors.. The manager called me today, I didn't answer because he'd be a little dumbfounded I was home from school on a Tuesday, or he'd think I was cutting, completely bad image of me, lol. Anyways, he left a voice mail and I'm pretty sure I'm getting the job. I'm pretty excited because $8.50 an hour, I wont complain. Having things to do after school gets my energy level up, for instance when I had volleyball after school I wasn't lazy at all. I never missed ONE practice & I never missed ONE game, I used to look forward to it so much. I guess working now will make up for it, because now I'd be doing something I really enjoy, which is good. It's 10:25 PM, and I'm so bummed about going to school tomorrow, I'm probably going to be just as big of a bitch that I was yesterday. I feel people outlook me as a bitch, like their first impression of me is that I'm stank, and @ times I hate looking the way I do, because I get judged so often. 43hueribg54ubjkgfnjd, Anyways.. I'm on www.faceinhole.com, and I'm pretty satisfied with how one picture came out, hah. Well I guess I'm done here, I just got done drinking my hot chocolate and it gets me so tired. I'm going to go lay down & watch some tv, waiting for Lauren to call. I'll update this tomorrow, maybe?


Goodnight, xO